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July 2, 2005

Read music magazines? Anyone?

Fuck The NME

“The Queens Of Noize are two very talented individuals.

Not only are they excellent DJs and responsible for kickstarting some of the very finest young rock bands this planet has to offer, but their weekly columns are a thing of wonder; a thing to behold.

As if this wasn’t enough, their television appearances are already the stuff of legend. Without them, we’d spend all our time watching ‘Will And Grace’ and documentaries on the holocaust. Is that really what you’d prefer?

Any bitterness directed at the Queens is misguided jealousy alone. After all, don’t you wish you could sleep with Johnny Borrell? Wouldn’t you kill to wake up next to that face? Of course you would. You would. You know you would.

To cap it all, the Queens take drugz. And what is more rock “n” roll than drugz?

Anyone who remains unamused by the Queens’ delightful frolics is a micropenised indie-boy, Volvo-driving Coldplay fan who probably thinks that ‘This Is My Truth Tell Me Yours’ is the best Manics album and secretly wishes the Queenz would invite them home for sexy threesomes and drug parties with Kasabian.

All correspondence on the matter is now closed. ”

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Posted 11:01 pm by matthew —

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